Beneath every stressful emotion sits a thought—a thought that may or may not actually be true. Once you question the validity of the thought, the accompanying stress in the mind and body starts to fall away. That’s the basic insight of inquiry practice.
The power of inquiry arises from the fact that our experience of life is shaped by a thick web of interconnected stories and beliefs. We judge ourselves: I’m not good enough. We attach: Nothing ever turns out right. We resist what is: It’s too cold out. These stories and beliefs play in our minds like background music at a restaurant, so familiar that we are no longer conscious of them. But we hear their message anyway. Without calling these stories and beliefs into question, we tend to just assume their truth. My neighbor is being irrational. My child’s soccer coach is unfair. My boss is controlling. These kinds of everyday stressful beliefs become our holy doctrine. And the more we cling to them, the more we experience stress, anxiety, and unhappiness.
The power of inquiry arises from the fact that our experience of life is shaped by a thick web of interconnected stories and beliefs.
The practice of inquiry invites us to shift our ordinary way of being in the world. It’s based on cognitive reappraisal—a form of cognitive behavioral therapy used to change the meaning of a situation that causes us distress or unease. In essence, cognitive reappraisal is a way of combating stress and building resilience by shifting the lens through which we view the world.
For instance, imagine that I feel angry at my coworker for cutting me off during an important meeting. Without inquiry, I’m consumed by these emotions. I can’t see past the anger and irritation that arise in the moment.
Inquiry is the process of shifting your frame on this situation. By simply asking yourself a question like, How would a person I see as wise respond in this situation? Or, How is this situation actually serving me? Or, Is it true? You begin to see this situation in an entirely different way, shifting from stress to curiosity, even excitement.
The practice of inquiry boosts resilience because we shift our ordinary way of being in the world. The simple act of questioning the thoughts that shape our reality (especially when they create stress, anger, or frustration) has the power to unwind the web of beliefs holding the set point in place. It opens the door to living a life with more compassion, ease, and openness to new possibilities.
A Tool to Disrupt Stressful Thoughts
The practice of inquiry goes back far beyond the methods of modern psychology. We can trace this practice back to ancient Greek philosophers like Socrates and Epictetus. It also shows up in a number of ancient spiritual traditions.
Using different words, each of these philosophies makes a similarly surprising and thought-provoking claim: Well-being and inner clarity don’t arise from amassing new beliefs and knowledge. This state of being arises from questioning the mind and letting go of what we think we know.
Our beliefs about life can quickly fall into the traps of all-or-nothing thinking, jumping to conclusions, fortune telling, and focusing on the negative.
At its core, cognitive behavioral therapy is based on the idea that humans have a biological tendency toward unhelpful and often irrational thinking. Our beliefs about life can quickly fall into the traps of all-or-nothing thinking, jumping to conclusions, fortune telling, and focusing on the negative.
Like ancient forms of inquiry, cognitive behavioral therapy uses reason as a corrective tool to question the often irrational beliefs that tend to permeate our thinking. Martin Seligman, one of the founding fathers of the field of positive psychology, writes in his book Learned Optimism that cognitive behavioral therapy offers three primary tools for disputing our stressful thoughts: “First, you learn to recognize the automatic thoughts flitting through your consciousness . . . Second, you learn to dispute the automatic thoughts by marshaling contrary evidence . . . Third, you learn to make different exp